Tuesday, June 9, 2015

You'll Get Used to It

"Doesn't anybody get any sleep around here?"
"The twins keep us on the Centurioun work-week. It's a 36-hour day. You'll get used to it. Or you'll have a psychotic episode."
Men In Black, Will Smith (Agent J) is talking to Rip Torn.

So, it's not a scripture verse. So sue me.

I've just described parenting in a nutshell.

You'll get used to it, or you'll have a psychotic episode.

I've had a child screaming in my ear for about 10 hours now. I've still no idea what the problem is. He had a meltdown last night and went to bed just slightly before normal time. By midnight, he was screaming bloody murder every 20 minutes. He finally passed out around 5am, only to wake up screaming 2 hours later. He's been fed. He does not have a fever; he isn't sick.

I finally got him to nap this morning, and my neighbors decided to mow their yard at 9:30 this morning. He woke up screaming, again. Just as he settled down, the artillery fire began to rain hailfire and brimstone on our roof. He woke up screaming again. Now, I think he's just overwhelmed by exhaustion because in the middle of what sounds like Normandy Beach, he's asleep.

I've also managed to put out 3 fires for my husband, and solve 2 issues before they became issues. And I just realized how hungry I am.

What's really sad about this whole thing? I'm irritated, frustrated, and on my last nerve... But I'm also totally used to it.

I need coffee, and I'm seriously starving. But I guarantee you, I'll set foot in the kitchen and start doing dishes because they need to be done, and I'm just that easily distracted.

So, we get up, eat, and start to play. Maybe we'll try nap time again in a minute. Maybe we'll be in a better mood once we get some food in our belly.

Maybe I'll tap out, and just leave you at the fire station with a note.

So, it's time for the second nap time. This time, he's managed to completely undress himself,
including the diaper. Ohhhh, we can fix that. So, I strap on a cloth cover over his disposable diaper. I put his shirt back on. He proceeds to only get in half off, so it's become a little baby straight jacket.

He's still crying. I'm in the living room trying not to pee on myself I'm laughing so hard.

Don't worry. I went in there eventually.

As moms, we all have those days. Days where the baby just literally wants to nurse all. day. long. Days where nothing you do seems like the right decision, where there's never enough money to do what you really need to do. It's frustrating. It happens to us all.

That doesn't mean you are doing something wrong.

Bad days aren't punishment for our mistakes; they are the hazards of being human. Just like when the baby wants to nurse, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you - the sink backing up, a bill needing to be paid, baby crying, or toddler emptying the contents of his cereal bowl on the carpet - all of that is part of being a parent. Your kid will cry for a variety of absurd reasons, that's not necessarily an insult to your parenting skills. And you'll get used to it.

Get used to drinking more coffee, too. Because, honey, you're gonna need it.


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