Thursday, October 1, 2015

An Open Letter to the Christian Mom

Romans 14:10-13
But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. So then each of us shall give account of himself to God. 13 Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way.

 This. Well, actually this entire chapter of Romans. I love Paul's writings. The PAHM version goes like this:

Everyone does something different.
Some mom's kids go to public schools, some private, some homeschool.
Some moms stay at home with their littles, others go to work full-time, others still work from home, others are in school, and still others do some of all of these.
Some moms are deeply concerned over germs and bacteria; some moms accidentally let their kids eat a peanut butter sandwich that the kid found somewhere in the playroom one day, and no one knows where that sandwich came from.
Some moms cloth diaper, some moms do all disposables, some moms do both.
Some moms take their kids to the doctor, vaccinate, and everything like a textbook. Some moms will to more holistic treatments, delay or not vaccinate, and don't always do everything like a textbook. Some moms bottle feed from day 1. Some moms breastfeed until age 3. Some moms do both.
Some moms are vegetarians, vegans, organic, paleo, carnivores, and some moms do all of the above.
Some moms choose to have a large family. Some moms only want one child.

But here's the deal.

We're moms.
We doubt ourselves daily
We worry about our kids
We want our children healthy and happy
We want them to get a good education
We are doing our best.
We love our kids.

Here's my deal. If you're reading this, and you truly do desire to set an example of Christ by being a Christian mom, then we need to hold to this as a standard. I know of no one's struggle but my own. I know of no one's children but my own. And I will ONLY answer to God for my children. No one else's.

That being said, now let me say this.

Enough with the "persecution." Mmmkay?

If someone disagrees with you, even openly on social media, they're not actually persecuting you unless they come to your home and try to physically harm you in some way. People have a way of being bigger than life on social media. They can get under your skin and say things that make you feel dumb, crazy, and like a bad mom. Most of the time, though, voice tone and emotion aren't translated well, despite everyone's love for emoticons.

Other times, please understand something: some people, moms included, just really like to be
offended. They like it, because they can make someone else apologize. They can be a victim; they can go to others for sympathy; they can then be the hero all in one day because of someone's comment.

Moms, it's time we did two things well:

1) Support other moms
2) Get some thick skin

Not everything said on social media is a personal attack. Sometimes, it can feel like it, but most of the time, it's really our own self-esteem, our own self-doubt, our own insecurities that let us read into things that aren't really there. But for the trolls, the bullies, and the sanctimommies that abound in cyberspace, learn that whatever they say, you have other moms that will back you up.

At the end of the day, mommas, we gotta get this. We have to make a commitment that we are to be a voice of hope and love, not sour looks and silent treatment. You don't have to agree with someone all the time, but that doesn't give you the right to give unsolicited advice that goes against everything they want or need.

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