As much as I try to respect my gender and support mothers, there are always those that give all women a terrible name. Unfortunately, the church is not immune to this issue. In fact, we pretty much have our own special breed of these girls: ones that add a spiritual element to the mix so that they can manipulate an ingénue not only emotionally, but spiritually as well.And among the naive [the inexperienced and gullible],
I saw among the youths
A young man lacking [good] sense,
Passing through the street near her corner;
And he took the path to her house
In the twilight, in the evening;
In the black and dark night.
And there a woman met him,
Dressed as a prostitute and sly and cunning of heart.
She was boisterous and rebellious;
[a]She would not stay at home.
At times she was in the streets, at times in the market places,
Lurking and setting her ambush at every corner.
So she caught him and kissed him
And with a brazen and impudent face she said to him:
14 “I have peace offerings with me;
Today I have paid my vows.15
“So I came out to meet you [that you might share with me the feast of my offering],
Diligently I sought your face and I have found you.
“I have spread my couch with coverings and cushions of tapestry,
With colored fine linen of Egypt.
“I have perfumed my bed
With myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
“Come, let us drink our fill of love until morning;
Let us console and delight ourselves with love.
“For my husband is not at home.
He has gone on a long journey;
He has taken a bag of money with him,
And he will come home on the appointed day.”
With her many persuasions she caused him to yield;
With her flattering lips she seduced him.
Suddenly he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter [not knowing the outcome],
Or as one in stocks going to the correction [to be given] to a fool,
Until an arrow pierced his liver [with a mortal wound];
Like a bird fluttering straight into the net,
He did not know that it would cost him his life.
As the mother of two amazing little boys, I have the honor of being the woman in their world right now. I'm the one that gets to embrace them when they're hurting, kiss their boo-boos, make their meals, and teach them what a wife needs to look like. It's no small feat, but they seem pretty fond of me. But there will come a time when I won't be their priority anymore. I'm training my sons to be Men. To lead, to be husbands, to be fathers. There is one thing that can derail the best intentions I have for them: the wrong girl.
Even as I write this, my heart goes out to this young woman a little. She knows that sex is a powerful tool. Every young man has a seemingly untamable sex drive, and she knows it. Maybe it's the only way that she knows to seek love. Maybe she has been sexually abused and her understanding of love is warped and misguided. Maybe she only views herself as a prostitute and whore and then acts like it to get attention. Even the wrong attention is better than being forgotten. She has learned to manipulate, and the scariest thing is: she is using God as part of her weapon.
"I was doing my devotions, and was praying for a guy like you."
"You're not like all the other boys, you're so godly and different."
"It must be God's will that we're together."
Yeah, great lines... except one problem: SHE'S MARRIED.
Oh, but he won't be home for weeks. She knows how much time she has before she'll get caught. She's a master of her surroundings, and knows exactly how to get what she wants. Again, a woman who behaves like this was taught that behavior from somewhere, and she's just trying to survive.
But seriously... stay away from my son.
What's sad is how many times in Proverbs this warning takes place. How many times Solomon warns his sons, to look towards their mother as an example and to look away at women who will literally cost them their lives. In Solomon's day, those caught in adultery were stoned to death. Today, we have infections, viruses, and diseases that will forever change your life - or take your life.
Today, with so many fathers that have abandoned their families, so much abuse, and the sexuality of everything in the media, more and more girls are hearing this message. More and more girls, even while well-meaning, are using sex and manipulation to get what they want. I'm not judging those ladies; they're in a desperate place and don't know any better. But my job is to teach my sons what a train wreck looks like from a mile away.
Right now, I can kiss the boo-boos and make them go away. It's far different when my son has managed to get a girl pregnant at 16. As a counselor, I saw it all the time. I heard, "If I get pregnant, then I'll keep him." Meaning, if I get pregnant, then he'll have to stay with me. Sound familiar? They're just women in training; that if they say the right things, do the right things, then they can trap a "good boy" forever - knowing that if they get pregnant, he'll "do the right thing" and marry her. At 17. What could possibly go wrong there, eh?!
I need more coffee for just thinking about this.