Tuesday, November 10, 2015
This Better Be Worth It
To the wonderful women who do the Bible study, please understand something about the young mom.
In order to go to the Bible study in the morning, I get up early. Depending on the night I've had, that can be a huge feat.
I feed the baby, and hope he goes back to sleep.
Inevitably that's when the toddler gets up. I make him breakfast, and hope maybe he'll actually eat part of it.
I then try to turn some kind of time to myself; but I have a problem: If I did dishes last night because I knew I wouldn't get anything done in the morning, I need to shower. So, now I have to entertain a toddler and keep a baby asleep for 2 minutes so I can wash the funk out of my hair.
I then get ready and that's when I realize that I've washed everyone's clothes except for mine. I dig through hampers trying to find something Bible Study-ish.
That's when the baby usually wakes up, starving like I haven't fed him in days. I get the baby, take him into where the toddler is so that I can keep an eye on both of them.
But the baby doesn't want to eat where it's noisy. So I do the best I can, and I get the baby dressed.
I pack the diaper bag. Hoping that maybe no one is hungry, but packing snacks just in case.
Did I mention that I'm usually walking around with my hand pump because after the shower and a baby that won't eat, I'm about to soak the only clean shirt that I could find.
I start to put children in the car. It's at this point that I realize, I'm not fully dressed yet.
I find shoes. I remember to brush my teeth.
I leave early, because I still have to check the kids in. I have to feed a baby. I have to pry a screaming toddler off my leg.
Then I get two hours for the Bible study.
After the Bible study, I now have two exhausted, starving children. They've missed a nap. The toddler has only eaten goldfish and animal crackers since 7am when he didn't want the peanut butter toast.
So, I take them home. What do they want to do? Cry mostly. I feed try to feed them. I try to make them sleep. But it's too early for afternoon nap, and it's more time for meltdowns.
Finally. Around 1:30, they pass out.
Heaven forbid that your study is in someone's home. Why? Because that person usually doesn't have kids. Oh, but they're a grandma, you say. That's wonderful. That means they have a tub of toys sitting next to their priceless antiques, glass figurines, and outlets without any covers over them. I'm still happy to come over: just let me pack up some stuff to keep my kids busy so that I might be able to pay attention for 10 minutes.
I can honestly say, the Bible Study I attend is worth it. It's worth the frustration. It's worth the exhaustion. It's worth it to be with other women who have gone through the exact same thing that same morning, and yet they're there also. It's hard being a mom. It's hard being a Christian. We need friends, and I need people that go through the crazy stuff also, so I feel less crazy.
But as I told my husband, who loves that I get to go to this thing. "This better be worth it."
If I get there, and everyone who doesn't have kids complains about kids today and how spoiled they are, and need to be disciplined. Everyone wants to complain about their lives and have a contest on who has had the toughest day. I'm out. If I want negativity, if I want to feel like I'm failing as a mother, I can do both of those for free - without 4 hours of meltdowns.
So, to the church that cares enough about their members to have these amazing opportunities: THANK YOU. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for providing childcare, food, and of course coffee to moms everywhere.
To the church that's considering doing this: just make it worth it. Make it a safe place. Make it where we can learn and sharpen ourselves. Where we can leave and we're a better wife, a better mom, a better Christian.
Also, coffee. Did I say that already?
Posted by Jennifer Twilley